So I really did intend to throw together an entry for the Xamarin contest, but realistically I didn't have time in my evenings and Saturday mornings to get anything substantial built. In light of reality, it was nice to stumble across an article with a silly signature and post a Facebook status that escalated into a more suitably-scaled diversion. Here's two weeks' worth of my free time:
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Note: I failed to test on a touch device until just now, and it doesn't work. Use a real computer.
Post your answers as comments on this entry. Hints are available, within reason. Enjoy!